these are chapters that i really enjoyed reading. not because i am married, or divorced or anything like that. but because i feel like i am witnessing more and more divorces now days.
i think that marriage and relationships are a valuable gift that shouldnt be taken lightly. I think that in most cases it is taken too lightly. I feel like alot of people are getting married for the wrong reasons, such as the pressure from a family memeber, or due to a pregnancy, etc. i hate the fact that it seems divorce in the new normal. Just from seeing couples going through divorces around me, it seems most couples are not trying to work out their differences, they'd rather just jump right to getting a divorce, just because they can. it baffeled my mind that the united states has one of the highest divorce rates in the world, and italy has the lowest. what are couples in italy doing differently then couples in the united states? Im not saying that i am totally against divorce, i mean if someone isnt happy, why make them suffer. but i do feel that most couples should at least try to work on things before taking the easy way out.
is the divorce rate getting higher because people have been getting married at a younger age? is it because people dont talk about one anothers morals and beliefs before tying the not?
I agree. A lot of people are bailing from their marriages the minute they think they are over. My parents have been married for 27 years now and I've seen them get very low in their relationship. They split up for about 3 months, went to counseling, and did what they could to make things work, because they love each other, and now are happily back together. I feel like people are way too quick on just throwing in the towel and they forget why they were together in the first place.
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree with you that people are taking marriage too lightly. I have 2 friends, both 25, who got married when they were 18 and I am happy to say that they are still with their husbands, making it work. But it definitely seems like the norm nowadays to date someone for 5 or 6 months and then get married. I don't think I could ever do that. I've been with my boyfriend for 4 years and we're still holding off on getting married. Not because we don't love each other, we just know that things change, people change, and you can't predict how things are going to turn out.
Great Blog!
I agree! I do think that marriage is taken too lightly in our society, and that the divorce rate is too high. I think the whole "love is blind" aspect of the relationship has a lot to do with it. Initially, in the relationship, you have all this passion for one another, can't keep your hands off each other, and your partner can do no wrong, but when that eventually wears off, people become disenchanted and that's when all the problems start. In order to have a successful marriage you have to be willing to put in the effort it takes to solve any issues or problems that might arise, and a lot of people don't want to, so they just give up and get a divorce. Maybe, since divorce is so easy, we need to make getting a marriage license a lot harder!! There should be some sort of a mandatory course or training that all couples are required to complete before they can actually get married, just like you have to do in order to get your driver's license!:) If this was the case, I bet we would see our country's divorce rate drop.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your blog!
I'm lucky, my parents have been married 50 years, and they gave me a pretty solid model to work from. Something my dad told me, once I was old enough to understand it: "Love is a choice." He said that every morning, he wakes up, and there is a choice in his head - subconscious, mostly - that he is in love with his wife.
ReplyDeleteIt's not something you fall into, that's "infatuation" and it doesn't last. You must be an active participant in "being in love." You do the work necessary to sustain a loving and supportive relationship because you chose to.